The Way It CouldShould Have Been
by FollowTheLeader101
Summary: Why did Shepard have to make the final sacrifice? Why couldn't someone else have done it? This is a story about what would have happened if Shepard had the choice take out of her hands, and lives to tell the tale.


(warning! If you have not finished the 3rd mass effect DON'T READ! It will ruin the rest of the game and make you prematurely depressed. Although if you have already played the 3rd mass effect I hope you enjoy this because I wrote it right after I finished the game (after my tissues were used up). More recently I pulled it out again and fixed most of the horrendous parts but feedback is always appreciated! I have never played the 1st game (I play PC and I got a game with a faulty code and never got another one cus that's bull# $^) so if I'm not 100% accurate about the Saren history IM SO FLIPPEN SORRY! Aaanyways I might write more for this story but only if people like it. Enjoy! :D)-

Rune Shepard stood at the top of the catalyst staring out of the high, clear window/ceiling at the battle raging between the galaxy and the reapers. Her whole life had been leading up to this point. Saren, the collectors, and finally here she was. She could stop all the fighting, save everyone she loves. But things are never that simple. She sighed heavily and rubbed one hand over her brow. The Catalyst had apparently healed her wounds to the point she could function, but her fingers still came away sticky with blood. She stared at it for a moment, slowly rubbing her fingers together, wondering how much more blood would be spilled if she didn't make a choice; or if she made the wrong choice.

The Catalyst, in the form of the human boy that had died on earth, stared up at her with eyes that glowed with a sharp intelligence that was incomprehensibly old. "Choose."

But Shepard's thoughts were miles away with a sleek silver ship that was probably well on its way to the randevu cite. She wondered what he would think. She knew what he would do if he was in her position, but she could also hear his voice in her head _come back alive_. How could she go on living knowing she could have brought peace to the galaxy but _didn't?_

"Shepard."

With a slight nod, she slowly began to make her way up towards the center column. To her left stretched a platform dripping with a menacing red light and in her mind's eye she saw the Elusive Man grasping the two connectors and writhing with pain. To her Right stretched a platform drenched in an ice blue light and in her mind's eye she saw Anderson walking slowly but surely towards the red glowing core steadily pumping clip after clip into the center until the thing exploded, enveloping him in a blanket of searing fire.

And then there was the green core, the future of the universe. She saw herself leaping into the green, and slowly becoming one with the great machine until it exploded and sent a wave of healing light rocketing through the Sol system. It hit the relay, and from there on spread to every corner of the galaxy; one by one everything and everyone was rewritten, half organic, and half synthetic.

She wondered if it would hurt. Had The Catalyst healed many of her wounds just so she would be painfully ripped apart? At least if there was any pain then it wouldn't last long. And it couldn't be more painful than being run over by a charging Krogan could it?

As she limped her way down the walkway, she thought about her life. Everyone in it, or had been, and who she was leaving behind. Joker, Edi, Mordin, Ashley, James, Tali, Thane, Anderson… Garrus. He would be devastated. Her breath hitched a little when she thought of the pain in his eyes when she ordered him onto the Normandy. To cause him that much pain, was it really worth it? Suddenly she was filled with a white hot anger. She growled, why her? Hadn't she already given enough? Why the HELL did she have to sacrifice a future with Garrus? The Fuck was wrong with the world? What was the point of saving the galaxy if she…

One hot tear escaped her eye and fell on the back of her hand. Shepard stopped to watch possibly the first tear she had shed since her teen years slowly slide down her hand, leaving a clear trail through the blood and finally slid off the tip of her finger. She stood there, quietly watching the little blob of blood filled tear sitting, motionless on the walkway."I'm sorry Garrus." Then she started walking. Her broken and limping body filled with the bittersweet knowledge that she only ever had one choice.

She was about one fourth of the way down the ridiculously long walkway, just passing the forks that lead to the red and blue core. Shepard never strayed from her chosen path. Never had. Never will.

She imagined a different galaxy, a different Shepard, one who didn't have to save the Galaxy, one that could live that wonderful life with a certain blue eyed, blue tattooed turian who stole her heart back on Omega what seemed like decades ago. They could have had kids, mutant turian/human babies were out of the question, but she could raise a Krogan. They could have had a house on the beach maybe even on Rannock. Their house would be simple, but comfortable with glass windows so they could see the sea at all times. On second thought maybe glass wouldn't be such a good idea, steel might be better if they wanted to stop their little krogan from charging right through a wall.

Then reality came and bitch slapped her in the face. There was no Krogan, there was no house, and there would be no life with Garrus. One choice.

Rune Shepard was over half way to her death, with only a few yards left. She began to pick up her pace planning to dash across the last few feet and dive into the column before she could change her mind.

At first she didn't hear it over the thrumming of the green core, but after a few more steps she realized that there was someone calling her, not The Catalyst, his voice was that of a child's, no this voice was a man's. Shepard stopped and turned her head, and action that first brought tears of pain then of disbelief, then of joy.

"_Anderson." _ How was he here? She thought he had died after the battle with the Elusive Man! Yet there he was, on the same platform she had been brought up in, right beside The Catalyst. He looked like hell, blood seeping from the wound in his chest, face, hands and just about every other inch of him beat up, but The Catalyst seemed to be working its magic on Anderson as well because he was slowly rising to his feet.

"Hey Shepard, still alive?" He gave her a lopsided grin that was garnished by blood from his still bleeding nose.

Shepard chuckled, stumbled, and nearly met the floor with her face, "barely how are you alive?"

"Next time you really should check for a pulse before writing off a guy like that."

The Catalyst stepped between them. "I restored the human male to make things more" he paused for a second and Shepard could have sworn gave a very small smile "Interesting. But his survival is irrelevant. Shepard you must make the choice before it is too late."

"What's it talking about Shepard? Too late for what?"

All the catalyst said was, "Shepard has a choice to make."

Even with Anderson all the way at the other end of the walkway, Shepard could still see his puzzlement, tinged with suspicion as his soldier instincts screamed at him that something was _wrong_. He just didn't know what yet. Shepard had never been the religious type, never the less she prayed that he wouldn't try and interfere.

"If I leap into the center column then every organic and synthetic become one. Every living, and nonliving, organism will become half organic and half synthetic. Don't you see Anderson? This is how we stop the created from turning on their creators! If I do this then there will never be another war like the one between the Quarians and the Geth ever again. We could have _peace._ I have to do this."

"Oh yea?" Anderson began walking towards her angrily. Shepard noticed, with annoyance, that The Catalyst seemed to have patched Anderson up better than it did her. Anderson was making better time down the walkway than she could in her sorry state. "And what about you? What will happen to you?"

Shepard didn't answer. She didn't need to; she could see the confusion on Anderson's face melt into horrified clarity.

"Shepard Commander will become one with the machine. Her DNA will make the merge of organics and Synthetics possible." The Catilists small form stood in exactly the same spot as before. The only thing that moved were his eyes. They flicked from the two organic figures before him, his expression blank and seemly uncaring.

Anderson was about a third of the way down the Walkway; Shepard started backing away from the advancing Admiral trying to hurry her half dead body to move _just a little bit farther._

"Anderson please,"

"Who gave you the right to just through your life away?"

"Anderson I have to do this. What more important? My life or the life of every person in the galaxy? The life of every unborn or uncreated child? I've sacrificed so much for this Anderson. If I don't do this then all the blood sweat and tears I've ever put into this galaxy won't mean anything."

With enormous effort, Shepard turned and began to run towards the center core, behind her she could hear Anderson's footsteps break into a run. Just a little but more, a yard, ten feet, six feet, Shepard lunged forward with the last of her strength, the top of her body passed over the edge of the walkway, her fingers reached for the green light.

Anderson landed heavily on her legs, pinning her from the hip, down to the walkway. Shepard's fingers barely missed the green column of life, and then gravity did its part, slamming her torso and face into the side of the walkway. Shepard gasped but no breath filled her battered lunges, she struggled for a second as Anderson heaved her back onto the walkway, but then went limp. Staring at the celling she didn't have the breath, strength, or willpower to fight him so she just lay there quietly breathing, waiting for what Anderson was going to do next.

Anderson keeled down next to Shepard's head and said in a quiet voice "Shepard, look at me." Slowly and painfully she turned her head to look at her old friend.

"Your right. This needs to be done. But not by you; you've done enough."

Shepard, knowing where this was going opened her mouth to violently protest, but Anderson got there first.

"Shepard shut up and listen. You have saved the Galaxy not once, not twice, but three times. You bartered a peace between not just the Turians and Krogan, but the Geth and the Quarians too! You defeated Serian and the Collectors and helped defend earth against the reapers. You have helped so many people, saved so many lives, and you think you can just kill yourself? Just like that? No. You have done _enough_ for the galaxy. Its time people started giving back to you. Starting with me." With a grunt, Anderson heaved himself up and started towards the center spire.

With a heave Shepard sat up on her elbows and turned to face Anderson. She cleared her throat, tried to speak, failed, cleared it again and croaked "Anderson… what about you? You have given your life to the people too. Why should you have to do it? Anderson… what about Kalie? If you died it would tear her apart."

Looking at Anderson outlined in green by the core, Shepard was in awe. He stood tall and strong, even as the blood from his wounds made a steady pitter patter on the Walkway. He never faltered as he said,

"She's dead. I was on the com with her when it happened. She was helping with evac. and a husk came out of nowhere and tore her apart." He turned to look at her with a pained smile on his face "Shepard I have no family, most of my friends are gone, your one of the last and Kaylie… I'm a dead man walking. I couldn't live with myself if I let you take your life when I have none. Besides, I'd rather not have an angry Turian after me because I let his girl die."

Tears were pooling at the corners of Shepard's eyes, she wanted to jump up and stop him, but her body wouldn't answer her and frankly, she was tiered. Part of her was glad, glad that he would make the ultimate sacrifice.

Instead of her.

"Anderson…before… I thought of not doing it. I was angry that the world would make me give _everything, _even my future. Then I remembered something the Elusive man said "_you live by your ideals" _if I didn't do this last thing then everything I stand for everything I've _done _will have meant nothing."

Still looking at the column of light, Anderson said with a chuckle "then it's a good thing I'm not giving you a choice. You can rest in peace knowing the final decision wasn't yours to make."

"It's been an honor knowing you Anderson. I will _never_ forget you."

Anderson turned to face her. "No Shepard, it's been an honor knowing _you._" And with that he let himself fall backwards into the green abyss.

A single tear dripped off Shepard's chin, and landed on the platform. It was crystal clear.

Then there was a big green bang that tore her world apart.


End file.
